Plasmafunk! | Top Ten Lists

13. Demolish all the walls on the outside of your house and replace them with glass so that you can see what everyone is doing outside and everyone can see what you're doing inside.
12. Shave your legs in the yard, using your garden hose.
11. Make sure to implement friendly gestures like slapping your neighbor?s spouse?s ass every time you see her (or him).
10. Every year, make Halloween more fun by passing out candy with razors and drugs imbedded in them. (The police might be even more annoyed than your neighbors. That?s like hitting two birds with one stone!!)
9. Put a Laz-E-Boy recliner in your backyard. (Put it right next to your barber?s chair and pool table.)
8. Mow your lawn with hedge trimmers.
7. Make your property a separate country, independent of the United States, and ask your neighbors if they would like to secede with you.
6. Paint every picket on your side of the fence a different color of the rainbow.
5. Go over to your neighbor's house, knock on the door, ask to borrow their bathroom since your toilet is clogged, and then proceed to take a shower and make use of every available toiletry in their bathroom.
4. After saying a phrase like, ?There?s more than one way to skin a cat,? offer to prove it to your neighbor with one of the stray felines running about the neighborhood.
3. Mow a skull and crossbones pattern in your lawn.
2. Follow your neighbor's kid home from school and tell him there's a puppy dog and lots of candy in the backseat of your car.
1. Ask the "lady in the household" if they enjoying swinging. (Nothing like a little wife swapping to get to know the neighbors.)