New Miracle Diet Combines Effectiveness of Exercise with Efficiency of Moderation!
-luke

From the makers of the Juice-o-matic/paint stripping machine ? and the power sanding diaper changer ? - a brand new miracle diet!! This new program, designed especially for the American consumer, is a revolutionary new idea in the fight against fat!

The secret is in the simple, but effective basis: eat moderately and exercise regularly! This miracle, not available in stores, comes to your door with just a simple phone call! Just give us your credit card and social security numbers, and we will send you our brochure, a handy calendar, some soup cans, and some self-will!

But wait!! If you call right now, we?ll throw in a pair of jogging pants for free!! And all for the low, low price of: Not $89.99! Not $79.99! Not $69.99! But $59.99!!! Can you believe that value!?!?!

And if you call, now, we?ll throw in the patented fat reducer ? salad tongs that work only without the presence of ranch dressing!

The secret equation is based on ancient native folklore that said that a moderated diet, combined with regular exercise (walking, jogging, picking things up) will help you cut those pounds and stay trim for bikini season! And you just can?t argue with results ? anyone with any sort of muscular body or who is in shape at all is on this diet!!

It?s amazing, and, oh, so cheap! Call now!!!!*

*Don?t actually call us. We won?t be there.

Previous

Random

Index

Most Recent

Next